CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR
PG-13
143 minutes
Director: Anthony Russo, Joe Russo
Writers: Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely, Mark Millar, Joe Simon, Jack Kirby
CAST
Iron Man…Robert Downey Junior
Captain America…Chris Evans
Hawkeye…Jeremy Renner
Falcon…Anthony Mackie
Ant-Man…Paul Rudd
Black Widow…Scarlett Johansson
CIVIL WAR?
One look at the title, and you know what it’s about: the American Civil War. The Avengers reenact the Battle of Gettysburg, as a team building exercise, but they never get to reenact anything. Before the fake battle begins, Loki and his intergalactic minions open a wormhole, and the Avengers are transported into the real Civil War. And this time the right side will win. No, hear me out. I mean if the South won, Lincoln doesn’t get assassinated. Honest Abe retreats to Toronto. And the Confederacy would get their own country, for a while anyway. Before killing themselves, through bar fights, incest, and slave rebellion…right around 1870. At which point, Lincoln moves back to the states, to sew together the tattered pieces of old America; because that’s how history works. To my surprise, CAPTAIN AMERICA: CIVIL WAR wasn’t about the American Civil War. Which goes to show that you can’t always get the gist of a film from the title alone, like NAKED LUNCH. Sometimes it’s best to watch the trailer.
THIS WAR DOESN’T SEEM SO CIVIL
I might as well start with the things I didn’t like. The fight scenes were frequent, and lengthy. Generally, I don’t mind fight scenes, but do they have to be so long. I can suspend disbelief for short bursts of time, but overly long fight scenes make you realize your watching a cartoon. I can now envision a future where actors become obsolete. And CGI people star in their own two-hour fight scene.
HAWKEYE…WHAT’S HIS DEAL?
It’s not Jeremy Renner’s fault, but of all the Avengers, Hawkeye is the least compelling. He shoots arrows, accurately…that’s it. If things took place in Middle Earth, and Jeremy Renner were Orlando Bloom, then I’d find Hawkeye’s antics more impressive.
LAST WORDS
At this point, you may have the impression that I didn’t care for this AVENGERS movie, but that’s not the case. I was never bored because I never had a chance to think about what was going on. Nonetheless, CIVIL WAR is still a solid, BM…I mean, solid, B-movie. Sharp humor, and an interesting cliffhanger, push this into I-wouldn’t-mind-seeing-this-again territory.
Final Verdict: 81 out of 100